I have been thinking: BABIES

28 Dec

So, it’s about 2 days after Christmas.

And, I am babysitting.

This is not the kind of babysitting where you can pop in a DVD or send them out to play. This is the, well, frankly it’s the intensive ‘no-rookies-allowed’ babysitting. Luckily, I’ve been watching these two macho boys for about 5 years and I can basically read their minds. (basically). But, that doesn’t mean I’m not constantly pulling my hair out in frustration. GAH. They live on a farm! A FARM.

I have a fear of farm animals (no snickering). Forserious, peoples. Bad experiences all around. Generally, that means I don’t want to go outside much…ya know, the animals and such. But, with the farm and the animals comes a lot of rusty machinery. And, the moment those two ragamuffin boys step outside, I see in my brain all these horrendous images of heads sliced on jagged saw edges or nails in noses or electric fence zappings, etc. Put two and two together and you get hell.

But, that doesn’t mean I don’t love these kiddos to bits.

Anywho, I should be deputized..or something…for enduring this. JUST KIDDING: but what I wanna chat with y’all about is children and how I am a woman and have to think about these types of things and how it’s weird and stuff.

So, when we’re given dollies or barbies or whatever, that’s the beginning. And, by now this should be common sense. Then, we “become women” and bleed and whatnot and people make offhand comments about babies and how “one day” and yattayattayatta.

I am sick of it. I am too young to be thinking about this (as are all the chicklitz), but I still have grandmothers, aunts, old ladies from church (or even the laundry-mat) suggesting that “one day” I’ll grow a small mutant in my abdomen and name them SOFIE ANNE OR WHATEVER THE HELL IS COOL RIGHT NOW. I am sick to death, people. It is not rational for me to look at myself in the mirror and think, you know, I could have a belly out to here some day. UCK. But, by no means am I putting down those women that have or want children. (Y’all are  great! Keep on keepin on.) I just want to do my thing and not have people assume that I want children or that I want a husband. Lawdy, don’t even get me started on husbands.

Basically, my quandary is this: why do I feel like I have to think about all this? I can rationalize myself into believing it’s unimportant for a while but it always comes back. BRAINWASHING?


8 Responses to “I have been thinking: BABIES”

  1. leeraloo December 28, 2010 at 7:38 pm #

    Oh my god, I love this. I get so irritated with that crap. I know I don’t want children, but apparently, even though I’m 22, I’m just “too young” and I’ll change my mind. NO I WON’T. I don’t want to produce my own child – EVER. But as girls we’re taught from such a young age that this is what we do. We have baby dolls and we play house and maybe, if we’re enterprising, we’ll play nurse or school teacher. And it’s so REVOLUTIONARY for a woman not to want a kid that she’s going to hear about it all the time. I already have a cousin, she’s about 8 or 9, who asks me every time she sees me, “When are you going to have kids?” And I’m like, “NEVER, girlfriend, never.” And she just rolls her eyes at me and says, “All ladies have babies.”

  2. elysiasmith December 28, 2010 at 9:13 pm #

    “all ladies have babies”
    martian spawn. more like it.

  3. Copper December 28, 2010 at 11:15 pm #

    Am I intruding on a chicklitz only discussion? If I am, feel free to delete this when moderating, and all that.

    I think that modern society has somehow tied a woman’s worth to how good of a mother she is (for the average woman, of course. There are some celebrity exceptions, most notably Oprah, who’s considered a success despite not having any children). So women always have to think about babies because it’s perceived that women will ultimately lead a life that means nothing unless they have babies. If a guy isn’t married by 35, nobody bats an eyelash, but if a woman hits her 30s without any serious romantic prospects, whispers of “spinster” and “cat lady” start creeping up, and a large part of that is tied to the idea that one cannot have babies without romance, and so on.
    So to conclude (before I start rambling, as I am wont to do) you’re made to think about this because society at large has yet to get to the realisation that a woman’s worth is not tied to her offspring. It can be, sure, but that’s hardly the only option. No reason it should be treated as such.

    • Copper December 28, 2010 at 11:33 pm #

      Oh, there was no moderation this time. Well, I have egg on my face.

    • leeraloo December 29, 2010 at 12:32 am #

      Agreed. I mean, look at Angelina Jolie. Nowadays we hear more about her “turning Shiloh gay” than we do her humanitarian works.

      And I’ve already been told I’ll be a cat lady, and I don’t even like cats.

  4. elysiasmith December 29, 2010 at 11:25 am #

    It’s true, what you said.
    no eggs, no fowl (ha).
    But really, if I don’t get famous from this website or my acting or my amazing ukulele skills AND I don’t have children people will a.) think I’m gay, and b.) do a lot of behind the back whispering.
    maybe even rock throwing and cat killing.
    psshaw, damn world we live in.

    • thenerdynegress December 29, 2010 at 12:55 pm #

      I used to think I wanted five children back-to-back. Being a nanny and a big sister really showed me how much I love children. As much as I adore them, I’m still not sure whether or not I want to be a mother. My boyfriend and I have discussed having children and we both come up with the same answer, “That might be nice, but maybe not for us.”

      Might sound selfish but I REALLY enjoy my freedom. I don’t even have aspirations of owning a home for fear of being trapped in one place by a mortgage. I love being able to get by on close to no money. It makes me feel resourceful and stuff. I think a child would make me incredibly materialistic. I would want to give them every single thing I never had. So yeah, maybe kids. But maybe not.


  1. Forum: If’n Y’all Please. Let’s Chat. « Chick Litz - February 22, 2011

    […] have discussed family and babies on this blog before and really, I think all these Chickz know where I’m coming from as well as […]

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